{"id":345,"date":"2011-02-14T13:10:46","date_gmt":"2011-02-14T18:10:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/?p=345"},"modified":"2011-02-14T13:10:46","modified_gmt":"2011-02-14T18:10:46","slug":"valentines-day-confuses-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/irl\/real-life-story\/valentines-day-confuses-me\/","title":{"rendered":"Valentine&#8217;s Day Confuses me"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg\" rel=\"lightbox[345]\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"347\" data-permalink=\"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/irl\/real-life-story\/valentines-day-confuses-me\/attachment\/loremipsumlove\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?fit=336%2C280\" data-orig-size=\"336,280\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"LoremIpsumLove\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?fit=336%2C280\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-347\" title=\"LoremIpsumLove\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?resize=240%2C200\" alt=\"\" width=\"240\" height=\"200\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?resize=300%2C250 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?resize=150%2C125 150w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/LoremIpsumLove.jpg?w=336 336w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 240px) 100vw, 240px\" \/><\/a>I have never been a fan of Valentines day&#8230; well&#8230; that&#8217;s not entirely true.\u00a0 For most of my life Valentines day has confused me and I haven&#8217;t been a fan.\u00a0 I used to love Valentines day, I would wake up in the morning and under my pillow was a Russell Stovers chocolate covered marshmallow heart (or possibly a mini Whitman&#8217;s Sampler with 4 pieces in it).\u00a0 It goes without saying it brought a smile to my face, knowing my mother snuck into my room and hid that there, it was sweet (pun intended).\u00a0 When I first moved out of the house and moved in with my older sister in the city my first valentines day I woke up with candy under my pillow, my mother asked her to put it there.\u00a0 I wanted to cry I was so touched, I&#8217;ll never forget that.<\/p>\n<p>When I was little, Valentines was sweet, everyone gave each other cards in school and candy under my pillow.\u00a0 Then came the Candy Grams and the Carnations that could be sent to classmates in class.\u00a0 No one gave each other Valentines now, and not everyone got a candy gram or a carnation (It was different depending on the school).\u00a0 That was the first time I realized how much Valentines sucked.\u00a0 I was mocked for not receiving, I didn&#8217;t think it was that big a deal when it started.\u00a0 I send a candy gram (hershey kisses) to my best friend, but I never got one back.\u00a0 I didn&#8217;t realize that in the sixth grade I was supposed to have a romantic interest.\u00a0 (funny enough, I did have one, a boy in my karate class from another town, but everyone thought he was made up)\u00a0 I also didn&#8217;t know that I would be judged and mocked for not having someone interested in my, that my value as a person would be judged by how many candy grams I got.\u00a0 The next year I sent my candy gram out to my best friend again, and one to myself so I wouldn&#8217;t be left out.\u00a0 It didn&#8217;t help.\u00a0 Even before the teasing started I knew that the only reason I got an Anonymous Candy Gram is because I paid a dollar and sent one to myself.\u00a0 The teasing started because everyone accused me of sending one to myself&#8230; in hind sight, had I actually gotten one from a boy (or girl) I would have still been teased, cruel.<\/p>\n<p>I spent all of school looking at kids with candy and flowers on February 14th, it got worse in high school, sure I wasn&#8217;t teased directly anymore for not getting a carnation, but things were bigger and as someone not showered in presents I felt like the only one in school unloved.\u00a0 Far from the truth I&#8217;m sure.\u00a0 Looking back I am sure there were more single kids in my HS then those &#8220;so in love,&#8221; but I didn&#8217;t see that of course.\u00a0 This is part of the big problem with Valentines Day.<\/p>\n<p>Then college came, I finally had a boy friend for Valentines, and he took me out, we had a good time but really, it wasn&#8217;t any different then any other date.\u00a0 I didn&#8217;t understand why I felt like crap at the end of the night when I had a boy friend on Valentines day.\u00a0 Six more of these and Valentines Day never felt special, never gave me that great feeling of being loved, it actually felt like a chore.\u00a0 Now I don&#8217;t blame the boy, he was wonderful, he would get me flowers, take me to a really nice place (Unless it was a year that I took him out), heck one year he bought me a star, another year he bought me Buffy the movie and season one on DVD (for anyone who knows me, they know those are great gifts).\u00a0 Still, Valentines always felt empty to me.\u00a0 I tried to tell him to calm down, not to over do things, but he just made a bigger deal of things.<\/p>\n<p>When I got together with my now husband I remember talking about Valentines day with him, he hated it as much as I did, and I loved that.\u00a0 Our first one together I think I got him a chef&#8217;s knife, not because it was Valentines day, but because he needed one and I went out and got him one (and some other essentials for his make shift kitchen in barracks.)\u00a0 Since we have been together we never celebrated Valentines day.\u00a0 If it&#8217;s a weekend we might go out to dinner, but we normally would.\u00a0 We have gone out once to a special Valentines menu dinner at a local place that is a little fancy, not because we had to celebrate Valentines day but because we read the menu and HAD to try the food.\u00a0 So glad we did, they had a dessert that is so far unmatched.\u00a0 I&#8217;m happy with my way of celebrating.<\/p>\n<p>Valentines day is not a religious holiday, it&#8217;s not based on a pagan holiday either.\u00a0 It was posted on snopes like ten years ago how it was a store that wanted to sell cards that started all of this nonsense way back when.\u00a0 Ever notice how when you read really old stuff you never see anything about Valentines?\u00a0 Or how none of the old paintings depict Valentines day or St Valentine or the supposed pagan festival? No, because no one used to do this.\u00a0 This is a made up holiday to sell stuff, comercialism at it&#8217;s best.<\/p>\n<p>I just don&#8217;t want to be manipulated like that.<\/p>\n<p>Also, if I love someone, I will tell them, we would have an anniversary to celebrate, what makes February the time to say I love you?\u00a0 I mean we&#8217;re already snuggled up cause it&#8217;s cold outside hee hee<\/p>\n<p>I will say, to me, Valentines Day is for kids.\u00a0 It&#8217;s still sweet and nice and really that&#8217;s the best.\u00a0 This year I will be with my niece and nephew on Valentines day, my husband and I are in different states so I made the kids Valentines.\u00a0 I have to say, since I was a kid and filling in every classmate&#8217;s names on little red cards, I never felt so happy making a Valentine, it was a lot of fun.<\/p>\n<p>So Valentines are for kids.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have never been a fan of Valentines day&#8230; well&#8230; that&#8217;s not entirely true.\u00a0 For most of my life Valentines day has confused me and I haven&#8217;t been a fan.\u00a0 I used to love Valentines day, I would wake up &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/irl\/real-life-story\/valentines-day-confuses-me\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[15,20],"tags":[39],"class_list":["post-345","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-real-life-story","category-reflections","tag-valentine"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - 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Queen, Nuchtchas is the owner and operator of NIMLAS Studios with the life goal of highlighting the awesome and good in the world and to spread the love of all things geek!","sameAs":["http:\/\/nimlas.org","http:\/\/facebook.com\/Nuchtchas","https:\/\/x.com\/http:\/\/twitter.com\/Nuchtchas"],"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/author\/nuchtchas\/"}]}},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1qyRu-5z","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":5660,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/creative\/daily-creativity-2\/daily-creativity-body-positive-conversation-hearts\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":0},"title":"Daily Creativity: Body Positive Conversation Hearts","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 14, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"Daily Creativity: Body Positive Conversation Hearts Conversation hearts in honor of Valentines day. I'm not a big fan of Valentines day because of the pressure it seems to put on people. It's one of those things, when you are single you think, if I was with someone this would be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;art&quot;","block_context":{"text":"art","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/creative\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Daily Creativity: Body Positive Conversation Hearts","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/BoPoConversationHearts_sm.jpg?fit=1000%2C646&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/BoPoConversationHearts_sm.jpg?fit=1000%2C646&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/BoPoConversationHearts_sm.jpg?fit=1000%2C646&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/BoPoConversationHearts_sm.jpg?fit=1000%2C646&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":3670,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/nuttybites\/nutty-bites-69-anti-valentines-day-movies\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":1},"title":"Nutty Bites 69: Anti-Valentines Day movies","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 18, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Join\u00a0Nuchtchas,\u00a0Aaron Jackson\u00a0& John Donahue (both from the Prisoner Introcast), Grace, Dave Slusher, Bill the Radical Geek, & Lulu LeBlanc, as they discuss the best movies to watch on Valentine's day for the non Valentines crowd. We verge off into the territory of movies that actually scared us in our youth\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Nutty Bites&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Nutty Bites","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/nuttybites\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=1050%2C600 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/CoverArt69.jpg?resize=1400%2C800 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4208,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/creative\/daily-creativity-happy-cheap-candy-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":2},"title":"Daily Creativity: Happy Cheap Candy Day!!!","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 16, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Daily Creativity: Happy Cheap\u00a0Candy Day!!! February 15th is Cheap Candy Day. Rory loves the day after Valentines day because it's also the day candy goes on sale. Tonight I drew him crapped out after overdosing on candy, with a big tum sleeping on the wrappers. Don't worry, He'll finish when\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;creative&quot;","block_context":{"text":"creative","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/creative\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Happy Cheap Candy Day!!!!","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/HappyFreeCandyRorysm.jpg?fit=700%2C477&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/HappyFreeCandyRorysm.jpg?fit=700%2C477&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/HappyFreeCandyRorysm.jpg?fit=700%2C477&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/HappyFreeCandyRorysm.jpg?fit=700%2C477&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":351,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/creative\/writing\/zombie-love\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":3},"title":"Zombie Love","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 14, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Valentines day was always a drag.\u00a0 If you were with someone there was the pressure to get it right, to make them happy and to just not fuck it up.\u00a0 If you were alone you spent the night alone at home wondering why you were such a loser.\u00a0 This year\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;writing&quot;","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/creative\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":355,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/media\/new-media\/nutty-bites-episode-02\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":4},"title":"Nutty Bites Episode 02","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 28, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Just under the wire, Episode 2 is up. Basically I scheduled the last two weeks of February to work on a piece of short fiction I wrote during NaNoWriMo, unfortunately I came down with pneumonia and could record at all.\u00a0 Luckily I had a Nutty Debate saved and ready to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;art&quot;","block_context":{"text":"art","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/creative\/art\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Me and my niece","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/Morgan.png?fit=1200%2C1200&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/Morgan.png?fit=1200%2C1200&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/Morgan.png?fit=1200%2C1200&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/Morgan.png?fit=1200%2C1200&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/Morgan.png?fit=1200%2C1200&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1085,"url":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/creative\/writing\/a-robot-love-story\/","url_meta":{"origin":345,"position":5},"title":"A Robot Love Story","author":"Nuchtchas","date":"February 14, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Last year for Valentine's Day I wrote a Zombie Love Story, this year thanks to the suggestion from Prof. Brainfever I'm going to tell a story about Robots, or at least one robot. \u00a0 BEEP! \"Hi, Jane? \u00a0Yeah, this is Sal, I'm really sorry but I'm not going to be\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;writing&quot;","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/category\/creative\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Robot Love","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/RobitLove-300x300.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/345","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=345"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/345\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":350,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/345\/revisions\/350"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=345"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=345"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/nimlas.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=345"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}